


s3abiscuit_sl3w03 has added jaik033

by stardustgirl



Series: Rebels Oneshots [51]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Rebellion Era - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: (Or At Least I Hope It Is), (well kind of), (yet they're still immature smh), Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternative Universe - FBI, College, Crack, FBI Agent Ahsoka Tano, FBI Agent Anakin Skywalker, Funny, Government Agencies, Hostage Situations, Human Disaster Anakin Skywalker, Humor, If You Squint - Freeform, One Shot Collection, SWAT teams, Teasing, Teenagers, Teens being teens, Texting, Wrentilles, group chats, it's there
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-04-10
Packaged: 2019-12-07 03:32:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18229343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardustgirl/pseuds/stardustgirl
Summary: history.watcher.212: Hello therenotthefbi_501st: oh wait what is thisfeminist.energy.tano: a gc skyguy get it togethernotthefbi_501st: love the positivity snipsfeminist.energy.tano: I apologize for his behavior.bilingualblind: Guys this is the adult chat not the kid chat so either chill or get out periodcooldude08080818: look who’s talkingnotthefbi_501st: why’re you in here anyway Hannotthefbi_501st: ur like a babycooldude08080818: idk i didn’t add myself did i?? :))|~~~|Or, group chats are always where the tea is at.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Ezra: s3abiscuit_sl3w03  
> Sabine: fadinglighttstudios  
> Jai: jaik033  
> Leia: ssaucy.rebuff  
> Luke: luke_alive  
> Wedge: genurl
> 
> Also, again, high schoolers curse but I don't, so we're still using Star Wars curses. As in, "wtk" means "what the kriff."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ezra, Luke, Leia, and Jai are juniors; Sabine and Wedge are seniors.

 

_s3abiscuit_sl3w03 has added fadinglighttstudios, jaik033, ssaucy.rebuff, luke_alive, and genurl to “chat”._

_8:00 PM_

fadinglighttstudios: ezra wtk

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: wut

fadinglighttstudios: wtk

fadinglighttstudios: you heard me right

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: its a chat

fadinglighttstudios: i can SEE that

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: and?

fadinglighttstudios: WHY.

genurl: why am i in this

fadinglighttstudios: ^^^ !

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: bc we talk a lot ??

fadinglighttstudios: and ?????!

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: i thought it’d be fun?

fadinglighttstudios: we talk ! a lot !

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: exactly

fadinglighttstudios: already !

fadinglighttstudios: don’t interrupt my chain

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: hOw was i supposed to tell it’s not like you said anything

fadinglighttstudios: bc i shouldn’t have to !!

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: *how

genurl: why do you type so slow

fadinglighttstudios: exactly.

jaik033: aight this looks like sibling drama so ima ,, slip out ,,

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: JAI WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU WERE NOT

fadinglighttstudios: SINLINGS

 

_jaik033 has left the chat._

 

fadinglighttstudios: wtk

genurl: lol “sinlings”

genurl: and he had a point y’all finish each other’s sentences see

fadinglighttstudios: why are you in this

fadinglighttstudios: ezra why is he in this

genurl: sinling-zoned @ezra

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: idk i felt like adding him since we talk a bit

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: wtk wedge

fadinglighttstudios: wtk wedge

genurl: lolll

fadinglighttstudios: whyd u type three ls

genurl: why’d u forget the apostrophe in why’d

fadinglighttstudios: wedge gtko

genurl: just bc u said that ima stay lol

genurl: already outlasted jai now i just gotta outlast leia n luke n y’all

Sabine: wedge why are you like this

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: stop flirting and go to privates y’all ur weird

fadinglighttstudios: ezra wtk i’m single

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: exactly

ssaucy.rebuff: Can you guys stOp I’m trying to actually do my homework

genurl: *stop

ssaucy.rebuff: wedge why are you like this?

ssaucy.rebuff: *Wedge

genurl: ^^ that’s why lolll

ssaucy.rebuff: Wedge I swear—

genurl: swear what lol

 

_s3abiscuit_sl3w03 has added jaik033 to “chat”._

 

jaik033: ezra wtk

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: ur missin out on tea

jaik033: wdyem

jaik033: there’s no tea here

jaik033: not a dROP

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: yea there is

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: there’s leia

ssaucy.rebuff: What’s that supposed to mean?!

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: everyone’s tryna flirt w jai now lolll

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: *wedge oopss

jaik033: eZRA I SWEAR—

jaik033: oh srry

jaik033: wait how’d u even mix us up

jaik033: our names sound nothing alike

jaik033: and he’s the whitest person ive seen since leia

ssaucy.rebuff: Jai I have a brother too….

jaik033: yea but we’re not talking abt him

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: oOF SAVAGE

jaik033: ezra this is aimed at YOU

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: last i checked im not related to leia sjw organa lolll

ssaucy.rebuff: Ezra—

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: wut

jaik033: there’s literally nothing here ezra i’m leaving again bye

 

_jaik033 has left the chat._

 

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: wait dont—

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: oh.

ssaucy.rebuff: Nobody in here even uses proper grammar Jai had the right idea I’m leaving too bye.

 

_ssaucy.rebuff has left the chat._

 

fadinglighttstudios: hONESTLY—

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: wtk where’d u come from

fadinglighttstudios: i’ve been in here the whole time lol

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: but

fadinglighttstudios: ye?

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: you haven’t said anything ,,

fadinglighttstudios: it’s called ghosting, kid. u should reallyyy try it sometime

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: f

fadinglighttstudios: what

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: i’m payin respects

fadinglighttstudios: to who???

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: my grades

fadinglighttstudios: ?!

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: pryce just put grades in rip

fadinglighttstudios: ohh for ur class

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: ye i mean i’m IN my class so

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: has luke even checked the chat yet lol

fadinglighttstudios: prob not

fadinglighttstudios: wedge can u ask him

genurl: why

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: why

fadinglighttstudios: why’d y’all send those at the same time

genurl: why not lol

fadinglighttstudios: wEdge just aSK

genurl: alright alright calm down i gotta wait he’s callin his dad rn

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: wait wedge are u W HIM???

fadinglighttstudios: yea stupid

genurl: ...yea?? why lol

fadinglighttstudios: why else you think i’d ask him lol

fadinglighttstudios: ezra u dumbbb

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: well sorry but i don’t know everything

fadinglighttstudios: haH!!

fadinglighttstudios: YOU ADMITTED IT!!

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: wAIT HOWD YOU KNOW THEYRE TOGETHER

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: STALKER

fadinglighttstudios: it’s called snapchat boi

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: wait u actually USE that thing

fadinglighttstudios: just for the map lol

genurl: aight it looks like he’s abt to be done ima ask

fadinglighttstudios: mkay just lmk

* * *

_9:07_

luke_alive: hi guys

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: sup

fadinglighttstudios: aight

genurl: yo

luke_alive: wedge you’re literally right next to me

genurl: exactly

luke_alive: okay Wedge .

luke_alive: anyway Ezra what’d you want?

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: nothing lol

luke_alive: ??

luke_alive: then why’d you ask me ??

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: i didn’t ask u anything loll

luke_alive: ?

luke_alive: Wedge said you did

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: no i told him to ask u if you’d even checked the chat yet

genurl: no i didn’t

luke_alive: oh

luke_alive: wait why

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: idk lol

luke_alive: oh

luke_alive: Leia can you tell Artoo I said hi

fadinglighttstudios: she left the chat lol

luke_alive: oh rip

luke_alive: wait who’s even in this

 

_fadinglighttstudios has renamed the chat to “bye nerds”_

 

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: wut

genurl: what

 

_fadinglighttstudios has left the chat._

 

luke_alive: wait what

luke_alive: oh

genurl: oofff rip

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: can we get an f in the chat folks

genurl: yeah here

 

_genurl has left the chat._

 

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: oOFF.

luke_alive: mk uhhh

luke_alive: sorry Ezra

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: wait luke wut

luke_alive: bye

 

_luke_alive has left the chat._

 

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: ah kriff.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ezra is a freshman and Sabine’s a sophomore, this takes place about five months after Kanan’s been released from the hospital following the Maul incident (so in March/April of second semester).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ezra: s3abiscuit_sl3w03  
> Sabine: fadinglighttstudios  
> Kanan: bilingualblind (main) // blindbroadcasts (podcasting account)  
> Hera: ghostgirl_pilots

_s3abiscuit_sl3w03 has added fadinglighttstudios, bilingualblind, blindbroadcasts, and ghostgirl_pilots to “fam”._

_8:00 PM_

fadinglighttstudios: ezra why’d you add both of kanan’s users

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: bc idk which one he uses more

bilingualblind: I use both period see question mark

blindbroadcasts: Asterisk see question mark

fadinglighttstudios: kanan why haven’t you fixed that by now

bilingualblind: Fixed what question mark

fadinglighttstudios: u know, the whole question mark-period thing

bilingualblind: What do you mean it’s correct punctuation isn’t it question mark

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: she means it’s actually typing out the words

bilingualblind: Oh period

ghostgirl_pilots: Kanan honey just don’t even say the punctuation at this point and I promise it’ll help.

bilingualblind: But you guys are period

fadinglighttstudios: lol no only hera is

bilingualblind: Oh period

fadinglighttstudios: also ezra another question why’d you name the chat “fam” like ?? we aren’t ??

bilingualblind: I think at this point it’s kind of a given period

fadinglighttstudios: kANAN P L E A S E--

ghostgirl_pilots: Sabine calm down you have to remember he’s blind :)

fadinglighttstudios: exACTLY !!

fadinglighttstudios: SO HE SHOULDNT CARE ABT PUNCTUATION THIS MUCHHH

fadinglighttstudios: URGH

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: lol if i knew it made u this upset i would’ve done it sooner too period

fadinglighttstudios: eZRA I SWEAR--

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: yea and pryce hates it period

fadinglighttstudios: ASDFH;JKL EZRA

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: smiley face period

fadinglighttstudios: EZRA KRIFFINHG BRIDGER

bilingualblind: Kids calm down the text to speech thing is spelling everything out and saying capital before it I hate it please stop period

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: lol maybe you should just tell that to sabine she’s the one freaking out

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: also we’re not kids

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: well i’m not idk abt sabine lolll

bilingualblind: Also please stop using the abbreviations it doesn’t read them right either period

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: ik

fadinglighttstudios: *sigh*

bilingualblind: Sabine why the asterisks question mark

fadinglighttstudios: kAnAn JuSt StOp UsInG pUnCtUaTiOn UgHhHhH

bilingualblind: Oops period

fadinglighttstudios: kANAN—

* * *

_10:01 PM_

blindbroadcasts: Yeah question mark

ghostgirl_pilots: Love you should probably go to sleep Ezra’s got school tomorrow and I remember you telling me he wasn’t taking the bus?

blindbroadcasts: Yeah you think I’m driving him question mark

fadinglighttstudios: I am

ghostgirl_pilots: Fair point and that makes more sense

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: kanan ughhh can you gooo?? it’s your turn on battleship

fadinglighttstudios: ezra aren’t u at his house rn

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: yea but

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: like

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: he’s downstairsss ughhh

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: that’s a ways away

fadinglighttstudios: isn’t rex still trying to recruit u for track

fadinglighttstudios: also can’t he like NOT play battleship

S3abiscuit_sl3w03: kanan can it’s a long story but

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: re rex--he was but i told him that luke’s a better fit besides luke actually LIKES running

fadinglighttstudios: so do u

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: since when

fadinglighttstudios: i saw u running w ap the other day

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: yea only bc kanan didn’t feel like taking him out

blindbroadcasts: Did too exclamation point

fadinglighttstudios: wowww throwing shade on a blind guy now huh

fadinglighttstudios: that’s low even for u

fadinglighttstudios: smh

fadinglighttstudios: also since when did u and luke talk

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: we don’t leia told me

ghostgirl_pilots: Kids don’t you think you should be in bed by now?  You have school tomorrow :)

fadinglighttstudios: im busy

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: yea

fadinglighttstudios: working on a big painting i need done for thrawn’s class tmr

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: yea me too

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: wait

ghostgirl_pilots: Sabine Chopper just came up to signal me and he’s trying to get me to come to your room, are you sure you’re working on something for school? ;)

fadinglighttstudios: yes i am hera.

fadinglighttstudios: mom

fadinglighttstudios: chop’s just mad bc i wouldn’t let him have my brownie earlier

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: why wouldn’t u that’s rude

fadinglighttstudios: bc it’s chocolate boi

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: o

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: makes sense

fadinglighttstudios: of course it does it’s me

* * *

_11:34 PM_

blindbroadcasts: Ezra go to bed I can still hear you blasting Aerosmith someone’s gonna complain period

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: yea and i can hear u podcasting

blindbroadcasts: Okay first off that’s not even a word second I’m an adult third you live in my house fourth I’m talking to some people from work fifth me talking on the phone is not the same as you blasting rock at midnight period

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: i thought u didn’t work anymore beyond ur blogging stuff

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: also ur literally on ur podcasting acc rn

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: and it is a word i just googled it

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: and it’s not even midnight yet

blindbroadcasts: Siri google the more you know meme

blindbroadcasts: Siri google the more you know meme

blindbroadcasts: Siri why won’t you google the more you know meme Sabine said you were supposed to be useful

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: kanan.

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: ur not on siri.

blindbroadcasts: Oh period

fadinglighttstudios: *sigh*

blindbroadcasts: Wait then what’s the name of the texting thing like the voice to text or text to voice thing question mark

blindbroadcasts: Isn’t that called Siri question mark

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: k first things first we’re taking you to the Apple store tmr.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ezra is a rising junior and Sabine’s a rising senior, this takes place about two weeks before school starts back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kanan: bilingualblind  
> Hera: ghostgirl_pilots

_bilingualblind to ghostgirl_pilots_

_3:01 AM_

bilingualblind: Hey Hera question mark

ghostgirl_pilots: Yes?

bilingualblind: Can’t sleep sorry period

ghostgirl_pilots: Neither can I love you didn’t wake me don’t worry ;)

bilingualblind: Kay period

bilingualblind: Thanks period

ghostgirl_pilots: No problem ;)

ghostgirl_pilots: Any particular reason why?

bilingualblind: No period just worried about Ezra I think period

ghostgirl_pilots: Yes?

ghostgirl_pilots: What about Ezra?

bilingualblind: I don’t know period

bilingualblind: I just ellipses

bilingualblind: I want to make sure he’s doing okay period

ghostgirl_pilots: He is love don’t worry :)

bilingualblind: Yeah but what if he needs help with his classes and stuff question mark and then I can’t help ellipses

ghostgirl_pilots: Don’t worry I’m sure Sabine’ll help

ghostgirl_pilots: I made her promise to ;)

bilingualblind: Alright period

bilingualblind: Night period

ghostgirl_pilots: Night love :)

* * *

_5:00 AM_

ghostgirl_pilots: She’s a good kid Kanan

ghostgirl_pilots: They both are.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ezra and Luke are juniors and Sabine’s a senior; this takes place about mid-September.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Han: cooldude08080818  
> Kanan: bilingualblind  
> Hera: ghostgirl_pilots  
> Rex: trainguy7567  
> Obi-Wan: history.watcher.212  
> Anakin: notthefbi_501st  
> Zeb: wrestling_guy4  
> Wolffe: w0lf.packk  
> Gregor: 5576_39_new  
> Ahsoka: feminist.energy.tano

_ghostgirl_pilots has added bilingualblind, cooldude08080818, history.watcher.212, trainguy7567, notthefbi_501st, feminist.energy.tano, and wrestling_guy4 to “Adults”._

_12:45 PM_

ghostgirl_pilots: Hi!

bilingualblind: Hey period

* * *

_1:57 PM_

history.watcher.212: Hello there

* * *

_3:12 PM_

notthefbi_501st: oh wait what is this

feminist.energy.tano: a gc skyguy get it together

notthefbi_501st: love the positivity snips

feminist.energy.tano: I apologize for his behavior.

notthefbi_501st: no need to be passive aggressive snips geez

feminist.energy.tano: sorry who’s being passive aggressive? :)

bilingualblind: Guys this is the adult chat not the kid chat so either chill or get out period

cooldude08080818: look who’s talking

notthefbi_501st: why’re you in here anyway Han

notthefbi_501st: ur like a baby

cooldude08080818: idk i didn’t add myself did i?? :))

cooldude08080818: ask hera

ghostgirl_pilots: Kanan said to add all the adults so

trainguy7567: Then where are the other guys?

ghostgirl_pilots: didn’t have their handles sorry!!

ghostgirl_pilots: *I

trainguy7567: Hold on I can add them

 

_trainguy7567 has added w0lf.packk to “Adults”._

 

w0lf.packk: Hello

cooldude08080818: sup

notthefbi_501st: nerd

feminist.energy.tano: nerd

feminist.energy.tano: skyguy stop copying me

notthefbi_501st: i—

 

_feminist.energy.tano has removed notthefbi_501st from “Adults”._

 

feminist.energy.tano: press f to pay respects.

cooldude08080818: f

bilingualblind: F period

bilingualblind: Wait is Bail in here question mark I can’t see ellipses

cooldude08080818: i mean—

bilingualblind: ellipses

feminist.energy.tano: …

cooldude08080818: …

 

_ghostgirl_pilots has added notthefbi_501st to “Adults”._

 

ghostgirl_pilots: Stop being immature that’s for the kids’ chat!! :)

feminist.energy.tano: heraaa

 

_trainguy7567 has added 5576_39_new to “Adults”._

 

trainguy7567: Gregor finally got one

notthefbi_501st: snips ima kick you out next

trainguy7567: Except I’m not sure how much he plans on using it

feminist.energy.tano: wait skyguy don’t

5576_39_new: I don’t plan on using it at all Rex but thanks sorry

notthefbi_501st: why not

 

_5576_39_new has left the chat._

 

feminist.energy.tano: bc

notthefbi_501st: ?

notthefbi_501st: ?

notthefbi_501st: ??

* * *

_5:56 PM_

notthefbi_501st: ahsoka ???

history.watcher.212: Hey could somebody pick up Luke from track please?  I can’t make it in time and he took the bus this morning. Thanks!

cooldude08080818: don’t you guys live like two blocks from school

wrestling_guy4: Yeah..

history.watcher.212: No that’s the Organas

history.watcher.212: Luke and I live a couple miles or so from the school.

notthefbi_501st: my kid can walk home

cooldude08080818: wait what

bilingualblind: What

ghostgirl_pilots: What

w0lf.packk: Hold on what

wrestling_guy4: what.

trainguy7567: Sir?

history.watcher.212: Anakin I’m not quite sure they’re aware….

 

_notthefbi_501st has left the chat._

 

feminist.energy.tano: lolll gottem

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have some crack for April Fools’ Day🙃


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ezra and Jai are seniors, Sabine’s on her gap year before college, and Wedge is a college freshman at Lothal University.
> 
> *This chapter comprises of multiple conversations to create part of one cohesive story (or as cohesive as you can get through text), and note that there will likely be a follow-up oneshot to this.
> 
> **Once again, note that:  
> wtk = what the kriff  
> stku = shut the kriff up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ezra: s3abiscuit_sl3w03  
> Sabine: fadinglighttstudios  
> Jai: jaik033

 

_ fadinglighttstudios to s3abiscuit_sl3w03 _

_ 2:32 PM _

fadinglighttstudios: hey nerd

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: yea?

fadinglighttstudios: what’s the deal w all the fbi agents

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: why would ik lol

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: idk anything

fadinglighttstudios: yeah, except apparently u know THIS.

fadinglighttstudios: don’t bother hiding it ik u do

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: hold on kanans calling

fadinglighttstudios: k

 

 

* * *

 

 

_ fadinglighttstudios to jaik033 _

_ 2:36 PM _

fadinglighttstudios: hey is ezra w u?

jaik033: ...yea??

jaik033: were in history rn

fadinglighttstudios: k

fadinglighttstudios: wait is he on the phone?

jaik033: ...yea??? why??

fadinglighttstudios: what’s he doing on it

jaik033: ?!

jaik033: wtk sabine

fadinglighttstudios: just answer me

fadinglighttstudios: what’s he doing?

jaik033: uhhhh hold on

jaik033: kRIFf

fadinglighttstudios: and?

jaik033: he just yelled at me sor

jaik033: sABINE GET YOUR FACE BACK INTO YOUR OWN BUSINESS

fadinglighttstudios: EZRA THAT BETTER BE YOU

fadinglighttstudios: ANSWER ME RIGHT NOW.

jaik033: AJI WHSUY SHIOUD I?1

jaik033: ah sorryyy he took my phone

jaik033: sorry.

fadinglighttstudios: yeah i can tell..

fadinglighttstudios: anyway i’m guessing he WASNT calling someone?

jaik033: ?!

jaik033: he definitely wasn’t.

fadinglighttstudios: k thx

 

* * *

 

_ fadinglighttstudios to s3abiscuit_sl3w03 _

_ 2:59 PM _

fadinglighttstudios: Ezra.

fadinglighttstudios: Kriffing.

fadinglighttstudios: Bridger.

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: you called?

fadinglighttstudios: WHY

fadinglighttstudios: WONT

fadinglighttstudios: YOU

fadinglighttstudios: TELL

fadinglighttstudios: ME

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: calm down sis

fadinglighttstudios: ?!

fadinglighttstudios: WHY

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: i said calm dOWn uGh

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: i legitimately DONT KNOW why theres so many fbi agents here rn ok?!

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: just bc my dads an excop and ahsoka comes over to our place a bunch w anakin sometimes doesnt mean i actually KNOW what fbi agents do ok ok

fadinglighttstudios: sureee

fadinglighttstudios: just like you were on the phone w kanan a min ago

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: okay admITTEDLY I WAS ON MY PHONE AND HE WAS ON HIS BC WE WERE TEXTING EACH OTHER SO YOU CZN STKU

fadinglighttstudios: lolll triggered ??

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: i hate you.

fadinglighttstudios: ok anyway just lmk why there’s hALF A DOZEN BLACK KIDNSPPER VANS PULLED UP OUTSIDE CAMPUS THEN.

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: where r u?!

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: there’s no govt vans???!

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: sabine wdym!?

fadinglighttstudios: i’m at the college rn i was catching up w wedge he wanted to go get lunch aND THEN A BUNCH OF BLACK VASN PULLED UI OURSIFE--

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: hold on ill as kkanan

fadinglighttstudios: hurry looks like theyre gonna put us on lockdown soon and then i wont be able to text u i dont think

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: why havent u just texted him already?!

fadinglighttstudios: already tried his response was incoherent

fadinglighttstudios: u can actually understand him tho

fadinglighttstudios: i think he was tryna type w out the voice text thing or it was loud or smthbc i didnt understand a word

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: k i texted him

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: what abt hera??

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: did u txt her??

fadinglighttstudios: ye

fadinglighttstudios: no respone

fadinglighttstudios: ezra ezra pls hury

fadinglighttstudios: ezra theyre coming in n callin random ppl out ezra hurry

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: srry kanans just being more incomprehensible than normal

fadinglighttstudios: can u call him ???? i cant rn they just yelled a t a guy doin that

fadinglighttstudios: ezra wait

fadinglighttstudios: ezra can u call 911

fadinglighttstudios: ezra pls

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: why

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: cant u text em

fadinglighttstudios: n onot here just pl scall them get someone overhere theyre not wwat ezra pls hurry

fadinglighttstudios: ezra they looklikethe yve got weapons ones got a gun ad hes wavin git around nad having us line up and hold on i think theres that tato o u showed me a pic ofonce on ones arm get someone ver her

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: k hold on

 

* * *

 

_ s3abiscuit_sl3w03 to fadinglighttstudios _

_ 4:01 PM _

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: k sabine theyre taking a look at it

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: whats the sitch

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: sabine ???

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: hold on zeb just came iin

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: k im w zeb he wants to know details of what going on

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: how many of them are there and what do they look like

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: sabine??

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: sabine pls answer me

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: Sabine?

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: Sabine it’s been 11 minutes and Zeb said if you haven’t answere d in 4 more then hes’ calling in an actual team.

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: Sabine please i need to know youre ok

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: Kanan keeps askjng whats going on bc zeb just called him

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: they just pgaed hera too sabine answer

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: sabine pls.

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: Zeb said youve got 2 min or theyre sending his team in w kallus’s group

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: Sabine?

s3abiscuit_sl3w03: Sabine it’s been 15 minutes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was inspired in part by a mixup at a camp I attended a while ago, during which two of my friends each referred to black vans as "kidnapper vans" and "SWAT team/government/FBI trucks," respectively. And don't worry, there will be a (non-text) follow-up to this that will help clear up some of the confusion and finish it off.

**Author's Note:**

> Modern!Ezra's a lowkey horse racing nerd so. Hence his user.


End file.
